ty anon it's good to hear i'm not alone. ita, i feel that most idols carry a certain degree of facade, that ofc prob contains some of their actual personality but i think also a lot of fabricated stuff, or like some oppars/unnirs where i feel that they up a lot of things for the audience, not saying that they fake it bec it's already there but they overdo it a bit. and you never know what's real and what's not? and regardless, people interpret things so differently that sometimes i'm like "..do we stan the same person?" lmao. in canon fic you can use these fabricated things bec, since they're doing it it's part of reality and who they are, to a certain degree, but they would probably not act that way if they were a civilian, so to speak. either way it doesn't matter imo, if i feel that i see something behind that facade and speculate that they act this or that way behind the scenes, then why can't i write them like that if i feel like it, you know.

what I read probably tells me more about the writer than the subject and I'm cool with that. I might prefer it when authors characterise someone a certain way, but ultimately that's only because it either falls close to my own preferred headcanon or I just find it that fascinating. basically lol. i often like it when ppl do different takes on people, like straying from the stereotypical/fanon portrayals. but basically i just like it when ppl write characters the way i see them or like to see them lol.