well people feel very intensely about this topic so sometimes, yes, they are probably going to be upset if you express a view that's problematic, even if you're willing to listen. instead of saying "it seems like x" maybe say "does it seem like x for you?" "how do you feel about x?" so that you emphasize their voice instead of yours? or do research on your own and look up what poc writers have written about the specific topic you're interested in instead of forcing the conversation on somebody who isn't obligated to be nice to every curious white person.